This post is ALSO a draft. In the future, it will be cleverly-written, concise, contain a few fun pics, and most importantly, a plethora of links to past, present and future blog posts. Bloggers, writers, people that write more than one sentence at a time, I salute you. Endless blogs, posts, scenes go on an on in my head day and night. But here, I give you my first draft to prove a point to myself. I can. I will. Whatever. Here goes.
My Cleverly Titled Post: (working title: Relax; take a long hot bath!)
You know the drill. Chatting up [Friend, Mom at the Park, Stranger on Facebook, Clerk at the Dollar Store, Guy helping your kid tie her shoe, etc.} complaining about your two very different but equally difficult lives, families, responsibilities etc. And then, the well-meaning anonymous person says 'Oh, you should just take time for you - go take a nice hot bath and relax!'.
Sounds good, no? Yes. Yes.
First of all, let's be clear here - this is not the same thing as the 'I can't even shower or use the bathroom alone' thing. This is NOT about time you are spending take care of everyone and everything else.
This is the kids are all gone, day off 'work', whatever our 'work' is, for whatever reason, at some point we all get at least a few minutes, an hour, a day, maybe more, to ourselves. Right?
I decided to see exactly how this might work if I tried to take a minute, 30 minutes, an hour or maybe even more to do something for ME. Long hot bath kept ringing in my ears. Maybe, because I went to my favorite depressed-need-my-energy-back place, disguised on Facebook as a fun night out, at the Merc.
Whatever, we all have bad days. I came home smelling like smoke, I stayed up until 4am, and woke up blissfully relaxed at 7:30am, ready for ME TIME.
A long hot bath. Easy. I got up, and tried to focus on just that. I made my Solei water and coffee (link to getting healthy post), noticed my old toenail polish and looked for cotton balls to remove polish. (note to incorporate this in to hugely-too-long numbered list below)
- Find cotton balls soaked in sugar water by the butterfly station (link)
- Get tissue instead and remove old nail polish
- Look for pedicure kit with sharp things, hidden of course
- Find 'Awaken' foaming bath crystals! How old? Who cares!
- Decide to turn on the bath tub.
- Put away all kiddie toys and bath products - this is ME time.
- Find bath full of lysol scrub I forgot to rinse out yesterday (cleaning in marilyn dress post)
- Rinse tub
- Try to drain tub; seek out and find drain declogger plastic thingy (link to actual product)
- Remove nasty clump of hair mixed with legos and old bandaids (tm)
- Re-clean tub.
- Hear $30 phone (link to clever post about my phone) beeping
- Check to see if is important. Don't know anyone in Oklahoma. No voicemail.
- Turn on endless supply of hot water from my super efficient tankless tank.
- Pour in crystals with a spa-like sweep of my hand.
- Go back to searching for pedicure kit.
- Find old string cheese under sink.
- Get lysol wipes and clean up nasty cheese area.
- Take out trash.
- Drink Solei water with a squeeze of orange slice.
- Remember to feed last remaining butterfly (link) a new orange slice.
- Try to turn on Pandora from upstairs iPad on my Chromecast.
- Can't remember password.
- Turn on Pandora 'Zen' station downstairs, already cranked from previous evening (link)
- Pre-warm favorite coffee cup
- Get stool to set stuff on by the tub
- Find old bagel stuck to bottom of stool.
- Get lysol wipes and clean it.
- Find pedicure kit under kitchen sink!
- Get out all sharp pointy scrapy things and toss them in tub.
- Look for Solei water (link)
- Find Solei water and add ice.
- Pour coffee
- Go back upstairs.
- Think about how I should be using my Fitbit again.
- Find it to charge it while I'm in the bath. Maximize me time.
- Charge it on Notebook #3.
- Hear phone ring again. Nope, just an email beep. Can't figure out my $30 phone settings to stop beeps from emails. Yet. I will. (linky winky)
- Take deep breath.
- Set coffee, Solei water on stool; iPad and phone on dry towels next to stool
- Stir foamy spa-smelling water so bubbles distribute evenly.
- Hear coffee pot beep OFF. What? Ok so 2 hours have gone by. Big deal. ME time.
- Go down and turn it back on - I'll need it while writing this clever post that is continually running through my head.
- Bath time - put two grown-up towels out -- rolled, not folded.
- Look for face scrubs and masks - maximize time!
- Sit on edge of tub drinking coffee, water, listening to calming music and dip toes in.
- Yeah you saw this coming -- scalding hot. That's ok, I know how to pulse point get body to adjust to hot water.
- Drape hot washcloths over neck and feet in a spa-like fashion.
- Hear phone ring. Not beep, ring.
- Dry hands, grab phone, note that my $30 phone incorrectly lists calls coming in from random numbers on the display. No biggie, not important caller.
- Hear facebook ding downstairs on Notebook #2 (insert link above about how I charged Notebook #2 just in case #1 started to update to Windows 10 when I sat down to write this post)
- Ignore it, no one on Facebook would be urgently messaging me during ME time.
- Tub time - sink gently into tub in a spa-like fashion.
- Note that water overflows.
- Feel bad about my body for a brief moment.
- Remember Fitbit and feel good about the future.
- Get out of tub to pee. Get back in. (This may have happened more than once)
- Wash hair and put conditioner in it with hot towel on neck! This is going well.
- Carefully mani-pedi using random over-priced objects acquired on vacations pre-kids.
- Bathe, sitting in the hot tub for a spa-like amount of time, worrying about all the other things I should be doing for everyone but myself.
- Drain tub, rinse off in cold water.
- Grab grown-up towel #1 for my hair.
- Find missing soccer sock velcroed to towel.
- Run it down to soccer area
- Remember coffee was empty.
- Go back up, get cup, refill.
- Wrap hair.
- Start on toenail finishes.
- Find good hair shears in pedicure box.
- Unwrap hair, brush and trim my ends over toilet.
- Apply pleasantly-scented body oil in a spa-like manner
- Mist myself with lavendar spray
- Dress in a spa-like fashion and head downstairs to write this post.
And there you have it. In 3 1/2 hours, give or take, I was able to take a hot bath.
Beep.
Ok, 4 hours.
