Love is love is love

Last month, I was fortunate enough to be interviewed by the folks at Seattle's Child for a story on larger families.

Sure, it was easy enough to spout off about the wonderful things I experience as a mom of 5 young kids. When I shared the story on Facebook, I was unprepared for all the wonderful comments from friends and acquaintances.

In spite of the comments in the story about how I don't think it takes more to raise 5 than 1, many of you said 'You are a hero' or similar. Thank you all. 

I wanted to reiterate why, in spite of dressing up in a Superman shirt, I actually do not consider myself a hero at all. I'm just me with my kids, like any other parent with their kid/s or pets or taking care of their parents..... love is love is love.

When to stop having kids!

I have seen many articles citing the do's and don'ts, pros and cons, of having more than one child.

I am often asked whether having one set of twins first make it easier or harder to decide whether to have another child, especially if you think you might have another set of twins? 

In my case, the joys and hardships of having twins, while my oldest son was only 17months old, convinced me that I did want to have another child.

In fact, I eagerly, secretly, hoped I'd have another set of twins.

In spite of the fact that I had very difficult pregnancies and grew super huge due to tons of swelling, I enjoyed every minute of it.

When the babies were born, my older 3 kids were thrilled and did everything to help and participate from day one.

Now that my youngest twins are 4, and the older set are 7 and my oldest is 8, things continue to be joyful, and hard of course.

How to decide...well, for one thing, time between emails takes a lot longer. 

And, if you like to shower regularly, perhaps 2 or 3 kids is enough. But, there is a baby for each older twin to play with... depending on the ages of the kids.

My best tips today:

1. Get a Floor Robot vacuum (Roomba) - the best game in the world is 'Ok kids, let's pick up everything off the floor so we can push the button on the vacuum and sit on the couch and giggle while it cleans". Worth.Every.Penny.
   
2. Build your community now. Embrace the well-meaning people that ask if they can help. Yes, they can. Invite other people over and let the kids prepare for the playdate by cleaning and preparing snacks, while you and other parents sit and drink coffee.

Help -- I can't get out of the house!

It is hard enough to get out with one brand new baby, but many Moms of Multiples wonder... How will I ever be able to get outside of the house!!: 

Yes, we get out! I've taken all give of my kids to Mexican food by myself...ok just once, but it worked. I've taken them all to a wedding. I've taken them to Halloween parties and trick-or-treating, and to a Halloween carnival, no stroller, at my First Grader's school... insane.. Enlisted the help of other kids' aunts and uncles. No sweat. Glowsticks around each of their necks!!

And yes, there are the usual tips about packing the night before, having spare things in your car at all times, etc. But, I think the main thing to prepare for is taking time for yourself so you feel confident that you can get out and do things.


As I type this, I've just returned from our morning outing -- piling all 5 in the van to drive 6 blocks to drop off #5 at school, then drive-thru banking and then back home to work on the 9 full laundry baskets piling up from the 5 of 7 of us who had that nasty stomach virus the past week. There are 5 more baskets of laundry upstairs. But, blessed are the loads of mostly towels the kids can hang on racks. Our bathrooms have a bunch of hooks drilled into the walls for kids to hang clothes. We have commercial napkin holders. We are looking for bench seating for the kitchen :)

You you you!  Sure, it is great to do things for the kids. But, take time to find one or two things YOU love to do and make the kids do it with you, for you, etc. Whether it be thrift store shopping, going to the gym, walking outside, driving around in the car listening to music or dancing in your pajamas, they will pick up and love your little quirks if you force them to.

In fact, did you know your kids can paint your toenails and give you one of the best pedicures you've ever had? I'm dead serious. Stay tuned for that tutorial and pictures!!

Today I gave away all our toys....

Today I gave away all our toys. Ok, not all of them, but I got your attention, didn't I?

It isn't even Halloween, but the stores are already buzzing with that toy-stocking shelf-luring glitter that will be Christmas present overload in just a few short months.

A few years ago, when I just had 3 children under 3 -- a 2 1/2 year old and a pair of 1 year olds -- I started trying to figure out just what they needed and what they didn't, and I ended up getting way too many things in our house. There were some power struggles over who got to play with any toy, and the babies were often placed in contraptions meant to keep them safe from our then-aggressive 2 1/2 year old son.

Fast forward a few years to 5-year old big brother, 3 1/2 year old little brother and sister, and 1 year old littlest brother and sister. Twins or no twins, boys or girls, the bottom line is I've just simply got a lot of kids.

And the stuff was driving me nuts. Your best friend if you have multiple kids? A big empty room -- even a garage.

I've also discovered by chance that sometimes the littler ones do really well with things that are meant for their older siblings. 

Enter the Goodwill lego table with a box of duplos. Our littlest ones will stand at that table on both sides and drop legos in and out of it for literally hours. Just behind it is a window sill looking out into our front yard. On that silly are a few spaced out legos. Next to that window is an empty bookshelf. Every day a few things are placed on it -- an empty tin can, a wooden spoon, a piece of an old belt, or, more legos! Walk or crawl a few steps the other direction to our leather couch... with shoes tossed all over it. Hours of velcro fun. Hook a few shoes together and give each baby one end... whoohoo!

When older siblings are present, we give them the power to direct, create, interact. They build lego towers for 'twinzilla' to knock over. They set timers for the little ones to move from station to station. They play dress-up clothes and run around the room while the littler ones look on in awe.

The older siblings of course have big kid toys, but they spend a large amount of time in our relatively toyless family room/kitchen doing things like playing a sink full of 'dirty' kid dishes. Add something like a turkey baster for hours of bubbly fun. Also popular is pretending to clean -- rags and water go a long way in our home. For the tool-inclined, a safe-ish screwdriver and an old baby gate to take apart and put back together work miracles.

And, let's not forget actual helping:

In the house - our 3 and 5yr olds load/unload the dishwasher, make their own breakfasts (and ours -- I've eaten toast, string cheese and soymilk with frozen berries in it... ). They help prepare meals, grating cheese, cracking eggs -- buy a Sam's club size egg carton or 2 and let them practice.. scramble the eggs all up, and presto -- they've learned how to crack eggs and you have lunch. A stick of brussel sprouts and a dull butter knife are fun too.
They help fold and put away laundry -- yes, it takes a long time . They dress themselves.  My kids go out often looking like bag ladies, or else my 5yr old wants to wear his 'dress pants' and a tie... usually hooked to a 'fancy' tshirt. People think I make him wear it.

They change diapers, prepare baby food, buckle/unbuckle carseats, fill sippy cups, and entertain babies in highchairs by running/screaming up and down the hallway. 

In these times, you might find that less really is... well... more!