When to stop having kids!

I have seen many articles citing the do's and don'ts, pros and cons, of having more than one child.

I am often asked whether having one set of twins first make it easier or harder to decide whether to have another child, especially if you think you might have another set of twins? 

In my case, the joys and hardships of having twins, while my oldest son was only 17months old, convinced me that I did want to have another child.

In fact, I eagerly, secretly, hoped I'd have another set of twins.

In spite of the fact that I had very difficult pregnancies and grew super huge due to tons of swelling, I enjoyed every minute of it.

When the babies were born, my older 3 kids were thrilled and did everything to help and participate from day one.

Now that my youngest twins are 4, and the older set are 7 and my oldest is 8, things continue to be joyful, and hard of course.

How to decide...well, for one thing, time between emails takes a lot longer. 

And, if you like to shower regularly, perhaps 2 or 3 kids is enough. But, there is a baby for each older twin to play with... depending on the ages of the kids.

My best tips today:

1. Get a Floor Robot vacuum (Roomba) - the best game in the world is 'Ok kids, let's pick up everything off the floor so we can push the button on the vacuum and sit on the couch and giggle while it cleans". Worth.Every.Penny.
   
2. Build your community now. Embrace the well-meaning people that ask if they can help. Yes, they can. Invite other people over and let the kids prepare for the playdate by cleaning and preparing snacks, while you and other parents sit and drink coffee.

Bath, and beyond

A reader once asked me how to entertain twins during that 1 to 2 year stage. 


Outside of all the other fantastic Seattle events and playrooms, another suggestion is to NOT try to entertain them and let them entertain each other.

Depending on the setup of your house/yard etc, stepping back and taking a deep breath and carrying on with a semblance of a normal activity can be refreshing and a good photo op. If you have laundry to do, first set them both down and dump it all out on them and let them crawl through it and mess it all up to the point of exhaustion -- thinking about it can seem dicey, but really how long does it take to pick up again, especially if you make it fun for them (peekaboo etc.)... my youngest twins, at barely over a year, were already well engaged in the spray bottles with water, dry mop and rags, 'cleaning' walls, tables, vacuuming etc. whenever I simply didn't want to go out.

Next, there is the empty bathtub with 2 little cups of those pudding things (99cents at most Bartells and dollar stores)... they can finger paint each other and the walls and lick it all off... and at the end, whoosh bathy go bye bye.

Of course, this all depends on your mess tolerance, but I have learned -- or convinced myself -- that some messes are so easy to clean up and so fun to watch, that it makes it worth while. My youngest twins are now 2 and they, unlike my older set, really play so well together, with that evil glimmer in their eyes as they dump out each others dresser drawers... but I digress.

And then there is yardwork...

Regular errands work well too, depending on shopping cart tolerance.

Sometimes, rather than avoid all the comments, it is fun to just go to Target, grab a Starbucks and slowly walk through all the aisles, stopping to chat with each and every interested stranger who wants to know 'are they twins, are they identical etc'.


Thoughts?